Dang it dear reader, it is confession time. I have thoughts and ideas rattling around in my head, and I will order them as we go: where to start…
I have em, you have em
I will start with the subtitle of this piece of writing, old patterns. I have em, you have em, he has em, and so does she. If I point my finger and you spin me round and round, everyone within pointing distance, and beyond, will have some kind of groove they are rutted into, a way of thinking and being and doing that may or may not, be beneficial. A reverberating echo sounds somewhere in the recesses of my mind each time I take the well worn track with the age old behavioural patterns. What are you doing… doing… doing… doing…: that is the echo! My answer back: I don’t know… know… know… know… Each time I enter into the old, I learn a little something new, thankfully, I am correctible.
The old pattern
What are the old patterns, you ask? To answer this, I must inform you of my unconscious, now made very conscious, modus operandi. I want everyone to know Jesus Christ as their Saviour. It is that simple. While I am not in the least bit shy about this ministry of reconciliation, given to Christ followers, it does not bode well in the dating spheres that I have tentatively tested thus far. While on mission for the kingdom of God, I have engaged in what is labelled, missionary dating. It is the lost lamb that I want to rescue from his faithless fate. I go after the 100th sheep and try to herd the little lamb, get him back into the paddock where the wolves cannot devour. I have been doing this for a very long time… since I met, dated, married, and lived with my former husband. This divide, between the two of us, was our demise. Candidly speaking, I am now, here, committing, to never being unequally yoked again, not even for a single discovery “date”.
What I have learned
I have learned that there is something called cultural Christianity, and it means this: when someone is asked to check a box, they will check the one that they most readily identify with, but does not necessarily inform their decisions or behaviours out in the world. So, when asked what religious beliefs one has, a person may say they are Christian, but really, they have no clue about who he is. The confusion here is that when they meet a Christ follower, they do not see that it is not religion, it is devotion to the God that saves sinners from death eternal, and a life now, and the hereafter, without him. To me, Jesus is more than just a teacher, prophet and all around good guy like all the rest of em, he is my God. Like I said, this does not bode well in the realm of dating, especially when the other person cannot relate.
Learning curve
With a half grin, I admit, that I am okay with my current learning curve, because I am well aware of the how to’s and why for’s of thinking and feeling; I know who and how I am as a human, and thankfully, I have the ability, and we all do dear reader, to objectively look at our patterns and ask ourselves, what the heck are ya doing and why? Also, this: you think that’s going to work for you this time? This is where the shaking our head side to side fits in, no no, it will not work… and I must insert, no more missionary dating for me! I have learned my lesson.
Annoyance
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| Drinking from the same Spirit |
So here is the thing, the reason for the writing. I want to live in the bliss of harmony. I want to drink from the same Spirit. I want to wear my armour of light and see it’s glow in and on the partner that I get to run this godly race with: one day. I want to speak the same native tongue, the one that translates into a life of sacrificial love for the glory of God. I want a man of God that loves Jesus so much that he will love me the exact same way… I want a man that has a heart for widows and orphans and cannot help but help. I want what God wants for his children, to be united by him, with him as the God glue in all of my relationships, and especially in the one with the eventual man of Gods plans for me. I do believe, that annoyance, along with disappointment, are the by-products of pseudo dating, attempts to make someone fit the mould we want them in. It never works, and, it goes against Gods commands:
I cannot offend a non believer with the above verse, because scripture is not respected by them. What I can do though, is speak directly to those who love Jesus Christ, and warn you, just as I have been warned by our God: don’t go against his commands. It isn’t worth the mini-relationship-deaths, the multiple good-byes: they are painful, on both sides.
Save yourself and others from the hurt of hopes dashed, and relationships that are doomed before they start. Just don’t do it. Say no to missionary dating too.
