Linda Grace Byers

Abandonment

Christian Inspiration

Abandonment is happening at record breaking speeds and seemingly incalculable rates. It starts for some babies in the womb, when parents decide that murder is an acceptable planned parenting option. Next we have babies born to absentee parents, the ones that treat their children as though they were a nuisance and interruption to more enjoyable endeavours, like work, drinking, smoking, socializing. Children are set aside and while their physical needs may be met, emotionally they become handicapped. Next we have the real deal, fathers, and sometimes but less frequently, mothers, physically deciding that leaving their family and ultimately, their children, is a viable option that will not impede or impair relationship. This putting self first over the child’s wellbeing and emotional health has horrendous life altering and catastrophic impact on all the interconnected relationships that once were. Trust, when broken, can be almost irreparable.

Self-absorption of self-protectionism

The parenting role has been watered down. Natural instincts to provide for and protect the vulnerable and young seem to have been replaced with the self-absorption of self-protectionism. This leaves the other parent, if one exists, in the position of sole provider, protector and guide in the life of a learner. What would appear to be old fashioned and dated, is the idea that God unites a man and woman for a lifetime of caring and sharing, of accountability to him firstly, then to one another and lastly, and perhaps most importantly, to the child or children the union has procreated.

Women and children first

Loving into the hurt

The left behind remnant… I am learning what it feels like, what it looks like, to love like Jesus. Love does not disappear just because a person chooses to. Loving like him means to love into the hurt, the disappointment, and something else. Loving like Jesus is without expectations, demands, or even a need to have the love returned. Jesus is God and so, he knows our wicked selfish hearts. This is why he came, to show us what love feels, looks and acts like, when the behaviour of others is less than admirably. I know that there is no perfect human example, other than his, and so I do not, must not, model myself after anyone other than him. He, dear one, has never abandoned you, or me. His love is faithful and perfect and ever-present. He relied on his Father while he walked on earth before men, and he did this to show us that while we might be abandoned or abandon, his Father, our Father, who art in heaven, never has nor will he, abandon us.

This may be stingy

Chances are good that this is a rather stingy message to read, because one way or another, you have experienced abandonment. The guilt and shame are useless dear reader, and resentment and anger are equally, useless. The only thing available to you is this: honesty, truth telling, committing to purity in love by loving others more than you love yourself. Loving, dear reader, loving like Jesus.

This may be your solution, and salvation.